The Epitome of First World Problems

Weddings are stressful. Anyone who has gotten married or is getting married knows this. And it’s not your traditional kind of stress. It’s a stress I’ve never experienced before. Your emotions are on overdrive and the stupid shit… it just starts to eat away at you until you just collapse into a puddle of tears and idiocy.

Sure there have been plenty of things to stress about. Preparations, venue, planning, what band to use who needs to do this who needs to that etc etc etc. There’s a lot of moving parts and getting all the stars to align is darn near impossible. And let’s not even talk about all the vendors out there ready and willing to pray on those ever fragile emotions. But when everything finally seems to come together into one state of Zen, something blows up in your face. I’ll say it again, weddings are stressful.

Without diving into all the gory details, there’s been wrong contract dates, a messed up wedding band, getting suckered into a nearly free honeymoon package that is a complete and utter scam, a million stupid other things getting screwed up, and lots and lots of drama. And I thought I could have a drama free day. HA HA HA. 

You end up in the place I'm currently in... The Epitome of First World Problems...

But in all that craziness you start to worry about all the little details and the important things seem to be left in the dust.

So as I sit here in a heaping puddle of tears, sixteen days out from my wedding, I’m reclaiming the important parts. Because at the end of the day, the important thing is I’m getting to marry the love of my life and we’re getting to spend the rest of our lives together. And that’s really the only thing that matters. The rest is just extra bullshit that might be wonderful to have, but in reality I don’t need. I have everything that is necessary to make this day be happy, the man I’m marrying.

So here’s a big middle finger to all the stress, scams, and stupid shit. I’m over you. I’m going to enjoy the next sixteen days, marry the man of my dreams and party my ass off with my family and friends. And if I trip on my dress and fall face first into my cake, well shit happens, at least the cake will taste good.

Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

After reading through a series of facebook posts incessantly complaining about a series of trivial things, I realized something really important. By worrying about every little small thing that goes wrong in our lives, we are stressing ourselves out. BIG TIME!

Believe me, I get it. I'm just as guilty as the rest when it comes to complaining about things. But you know what? While venting makes us feel better, odds are if we have time to complain about stupid stuff, we are really lucky in life. And should stop and remember that.

I came across an interesting study over the weekend about happiness. Know what the number one thing is that makes people happy? Well, it's sure not whining about dumb things.

It's showing gratitude.

Just think about that for a minute. (I'll wait)

By showing others how much they mean to us, we make ourselves happier.

So stop for just a few seconds and appreciate all the people and things in your life that are special to you. Forget the little things, that traffic jam, the barista that got your coffee order wrong, the fact that it's Monday morning, and remember all the good and wonderful in your life. You'll be much happier for it. And who knows, if you share it with someone else, you just might make them smile too!

Happy Monday all! I love you guys!

Writer Therapy

Writers are crazy. There's no other explanation for it. We write because we love it, but in order to do so, we spend countless hours walled up in a room, locked inside our minds, doing what the voices inside our heads tell us to do. If that's not crazy I don't know what is. So what do you do with crazy people? You send them to therapy of course!

But writing therapy is a little bit different than normal therapy even if it does often involve a comfy chair or couch. There are certain things writers need to do in order to maintain some semblance of sanity. It's not always easy to appear sane (despite being far from it) but here's my top ten writing therapies that help me hide the crazy!

• 10. A Good Book - There's nothing like getting lost in an awesome book. Especially if it's MG or YA, and has some kind of sci fi or fantasy element to it. I can loss countless hours in a good book, and I don't mind that I don't know where the day went. Some of my all time favorites, Ender's Game, The Secrets of the Immortal Nicholas Flamel Series, Harry Potter and The Hunger Games.

•  9. A Good Movie - Whether it's something I've seen a billion times (**cough cough** Princess Bride and Star Wars **cough cough**) or the latest release at the theater, a good movie is a great way to get my mind off writing problems and open my eyes to a great new story.

• 8. TV - Whether it's reality TV (yes i watch the Bachelor/Bachelorette and Survivor), teen filled drama on ABC Family, my favorite comedies/dramas on the major networks or my old standby SYFY, TV is my savior. When I watch I can just let my couch suck me in and shut my brain off. It's glorious!

• 7. A Drive in the Car - There's something about the quiet hum of my Prius and the road that calms me down enough to allow my mind to flow freely. Now if only I could find a safe way to write and drive at the same time when the inspiration strikes. Time to find a recording app for my phone!

• 6. A Hot Shower - Get your mind out of the gutter right now! It never fails that when I'm stuck and don't know what to write next, Orion, my muse (yes I named him and it's after the constellation) hits me with an arrow when the hot water is pounding over me. I don't know what it is about the shower, and maybe it's because I have zero ability to write anything down, and then have to stop dripping before I can grab my computer, but the muse almost always pays me a visit there. My muse must be some kind of pervert! All that aside, I'm seriously contemplating getting a wax pencil and a board to hang in my shower for these exact moments. The things we do as writers!

• 5. Write Ins - Every week I venture out of my writing cave to meet up with a group of local writers at a restaurant. We eat, we chat, we laugh, we share stories and advice, we help pull the plot bunnies out from underneath the couch, oh and we write! Good times to be had by all and it never feels like work.

• 4. Critique Buddies - Misery loves company and there is nothing like a great critique buddy to lift your spirits when you think you suck. They are always there to cheer you on, help you navigate out of a plot corner, and demand more chapters, which is a nice kick in the ass to get you writing or editing again.

• 3. Facebook - This is my biggest support system. I say I'm writing or I'm editing and not only am I  holding myself accountable for it but I have floods of people liking my posts and cheering me on. You all make writing worth it! Not to mention I can cyber-stalk my friends (ok I swear I'm not really a stalker) and de-stress between writing sessions.

• 2. Twitter - It's a whole world where I can get advice from people in the industry, share ups and downs and commiserate with my fellow crazies (I mean writers). Plus can we say awesome distraction full of fun links and geeky things?

• 1. Friends and Family - Nothing like your favorite people to lift your spirits and take your mind off of things. Plus they think it's cool that I write and always want to hear about what I am up to, which is the best gift a writer can ask for - an excuse to talk about my writing. :)

And if you didn't think I was certifiable before, you most certainly do now. Not to mention you are surely waving a giant nerd card at me, but it's a tag I wear proudly! So now that you have my list, I ask all you writers what do you do for Writer Therapy? And if you don't write, tell me how you unwind and de-stress. I'm always looking for new ways to ward off the crazy!

This post is part of the Writer Therapy blog hop